Ok loves, here's my Valentine to you all. My goal is not to make anyone more comfortable, because comfortable people don't typically move into action. But I do want my friends who care to feel less unsafe. More grounded. Able to care well. Not feeling so much like you've been run over by a car. We are all feeling that way--bruised, deflated, and/or on fire. That's what trauma does. But we can also feel that way and take care of ourselves and each other and our sad little bodies, and our futures.
First, I'm so sorry to write this, but the bird flu thing is real. Consider wearing masks. Wash hands like you mean it. Stay well. It's moving fast.
Now, here's my TanyaTalk: Unless you've had lots of trauma and know how to move through traumatic experiences, or you have had extensive leadership training in high intensity, fight/flight/freeze/fawn/f-it inducing circumstance, we struggle to move into action in these type of circumstances. Some of us freeze, too. It's ok. We are simply made that way.
It takes experience and training, or leadership and guidance from those with the lived experience or the training, to be active in an emergency and part of the response team.
(And even then, if it's not our house on fire, or our children and family being hurt, we might not shift into action mode. It's human nature--we are sadly, experiential beings.) (And and...some of us choose not to be part of the response team, and that is fair--sometimes we need to stay stable, safe, sound, present, etc.) (And and and... some of us are just dealing with grief or too much to do (kids, parents, circumstances like housing or financial instability, our work, illness etc). I could keep adding and and and and, but you get it.
So it's really a game played best by:
1) Leveraging our individual skillsets (do you like to make calls? do you like to type? do you like to send postcards? do you like to help people figure out what, when, where to go/do/divest from/buy/fund/etc (organizing)? do you comfort well? do you fight well? do you sing or paint or make posters well? what do you do *well and enjoy *enough that it is easy enough for you? That's your skillset leveraging lane.
2) Listening to your body. There are days I can't type. can't make calls. can't do texts. My hand won't pick up my phone. That's ok. Don't do those things on those days. Do them the next day, or the next. Feed, water, comfort, and rest your body. Be with your own self. It's ok. If your body aches, listen to it. Work with it.
3) Don't do things you feel you "should" do. Do things you can and want to do. There are many, many lanes for resistance work. Living well in one or two lanes is resistance. You will drive further, waste less energy, and be more effective. If you sign up for a newsletter that is great, and is telling you what to do, and it's too abstract or intimidating and you just can't do it, don't. That might not be your lane. Try it, but if it's not for you, it's not for you. Keep looking. Pick one. Just one! 5 Calls app for talkers, Take Action Network for typer/clickers, for instance. You don't have to watch the news to be informed -- just call, read, type, click. Those who are organizing do the filtering for you.
4) Enjoy every win! Celebrate the people, movements, officials, judges, and corporations who fight back. Wins feel good when so much is at stake.
5) Watch the artists. The comedians, painters, singers. They are here to fuel and amplify the resistance. To take power from the trauma and Authoritarians don't like them, don't fund them, don't celebrate them, and don't think they are important -- for a reason.
6) Remember you are a very small, but mighty molecule in a sea of molecules who feel the same way. Every single one of us, on any moment of any day we can, in any way we can, is doing all that we can. Every one of us that has a position of power, on any day they can, is doing all that they can. Sometimes, waiting for more information is a strategy.
There will be failures and stop/starts and all of that. And you will mess up, miss things, feel bleh. It's ok, the next right thing, for you, is ready when you are. Breathe. And drink water. And don't shut down. And if you do, then come back to us when you are back on line. But don't think your small contributions don't matter, or that there is no way to help. There are lots of ways to help. Happy Valentine's Day, my friends.
